In Which I Pass the Buck

I passed the buck today. I mean that very literally. Let me explain:

Yesterday, as I was walking to the bar (because let's face it, that's what I do), I saw a dude staggering towards me. He was bronzed, wearing jeans and flip flops, and very obviously drunk. I thought, "oh, goody. A shirtless douche."  I was about to eat my thoughts.

As I passed him, limping and cringing (because I just fucked up my heel), he held his leathery paw out for a fist bump. I was relieved that he hadn't asked me for spare change, because that's what I was expecting, and obliged. Because, fuck it, a fist bump is free, and kindness matters. This dude, who was indeed drunk, but also not a shirtless douche so much as just a happy, Mexican surfer, lit up. He beamed. And it was contagious.

I beamed. For no reason.

He unleashed a stream of Spanglish that I didn't understand a solitary lick of, but his smile spoke volumes, in just that moment.

As we parted, he whistled and called to me. I didn't even revisit my concern about him asking me for change, because he uplifted my mood so much that I'd have thrown him a buck for a forty if he wanted it.

Do you know what he did?

He dug into his pocket, and handed me a dollar.

For no reason.

Now, I've gotten to the point that I very rarely need this kind of help, and yesterday, I certainly didn't, but something in this man's heart made him want to give me a buck. He told me it was "from the heavens." He said, "I got it. I share it. Now you got it." And kissed his fingers, then held them to the sky.

Then we bumped fists again, as I burst into laughter.

As most of you know, I'm an atheist. Die-hard. I do not believe this buck came from the heavens. I don't believe I was magically entitled to it, or that I'd mysteriously need it soon.

I do, however, believe in that Mexican surfer dude's kindness. I believe in the inherent kindness of people. I believe kindness matters.

And I do believe I've lost too much of mine lately.

I decided that that buck wasn't mine. I was just carrying it. I decided I wouldn't spend it, but keep it with me for the next time someone asked if I had any spare change.

Today, that happened.

Moments ago, I passed the buck.

And I hope that kindness, and that joy, and that positivity follows it.