Pontification.

Millions of catholics spilled into the street today as their supreme leader announced he will no longer read them their bedtime stories.

There was (and will be for an undetermined length of time) looting, pillaging, raping of livestock, theft of women and children, abortions on every corner, repressed homosexual love, and general disarray, as the one thing the religious rely on for moral guidance has simply ceased to be.

Conditions are not expected to improve until a new lead pedophile has been selected to once again read their holy book for them and explain to them what lessons they should take away from it.

Meanwhile, the Vatican has declared bankruptcy, since no one is filling the position to instruct prisoners...er... parishoners on how much of their hard-earned money they actually owe to their god.

In short, there has been a complete and total meltdown of the very fabric of society until further notice.
No one at the Vatican could be reached for comment.

Ridiculous, you say?

Why's that?

Could it be perhaps that your morality doesn't come from a book at all, but instead, from your own brain?

Perish the thought!

One last question: if god can't be bothered to bless his representative here on Earth with the vim and vigor to fulfill his office, what makes you think he gives a fuck about whether your team wins the game or not?

We now return you to your regularly scheduled, carefully crafted hysteria, after which, I fully expect a second renaissance.